Inspiration Friday Party No. 16!

Welcome friends!

I'm so thrilled to have you join me for this last Inspiration Friday Party before Christmas.

But, we can't officially get things going until I announce the winner of last week's Giveaway!

Random Generator spit out the winning number and it belonged to........

Honey from 2805!

She will be receiving the oversized 12 Days of Christmas Towel, her very own Mint Julep cup and a copy of "Reflections of a Mississippi Magnolia.
There may even be an extra surprise tucked in there!

Congratulations Honey and I'm so thrilled that you have joined the ranks of Bloggers this year. It is quite a great little community we have, isn't it?

Earlier this month I began the tour of my home all dressed up for Christmas by showing you our main Christmas tree, a.k.a. "Mommy's Tree". As in, "you have your own tree and mommy spent a lot of time on this one so don't you dare go rearranging things!"

 I told you all about my treasured ornaments and the Angel my husband I bought as Newlyweds.
But there was one ornament you didn't see.
Because it hangs on the back of that tree.
And I'm a poet who already knows it.

Ahem...got off track there for a second.

This ornament could be considered the "Ugly Duckling" of my collection.
Can you see why?

It probably came in a pack of 20 from Wal-Mart and wouldn't be considered very valuable by most.

That is, if you don't know what it holds inside.

Can you see that?

That little slip of paper peeking out?

At a church retreat in the fall of 2002, we were given these little ball ornaments and tiny slips of paper, and instructed to write down what we were hoping and praying for that year.

Robb and I knew, of course, what we were hoping and praying for. We had been for some time.

I'm only going to let you see a little bit of what it says.

"We are more confident and assured that God is making plans for our child to come into our lives in the next year."

We rolled it up and tucked it back inside that cheap ball ornament and when we got home it got packed away.
Flash forward 5 months and we found ourselves adopting the most precious boy we could have imagined.
Actually, he was (and is) far beyond what we hoped and prayed for!
When I got out the ornaments that year to hang on our tree, I found this one and couldn't really remember what it was for. Maybe it was from the fog of sleep deprivation I was in!

I almost tossed it out until I noticed the "2002" written on it.
Pulling out that little scroll of paper I read the words that came from our hearts just 1 year earlier. And looking down at my sleeping baby boy, I marveled that the God of the universe would answer the prayers of an ordinary young couple longing for a child to call their own. And then, just to show off, He orchestrated the adoption of our beautiful daughter 4 years later!


And, just because it's my blog and I get to do whatever I want here, I couldn't resist showing you just how much God has blessed us by sharing these 2 recent pics of my sweet babies who are getting way too big for their britches if you ask me!

(These were taken by an AMAZING local photographer and I'll show you some more next week)
So, what are you hoping and praying for?
Maybe you would consider writing it down, tucking it inside of one of your cheapy ball ornaments (or a beautiful, expensive one if that's the way you roll!) and hanging it on your tree.
Who knows? Maybe the next time you see it that prayer will have been answered!

Now, this would typically be the point at which I would begin to high-light some fabulous posts from last week's party.
But, to be honest with you, there is so much great stuff in blogland right now with the Holiday Extravaganza going on that I couldn't narrow it down to only 1 or 2 or 3 or 4 or...you get the idea!

So, consider yourselves ALL HIGH-LIGHTED this week!
Think of it as my gift to you!

And, do you want to give me a gift? Well, I don't know about you, but time is not on my side these days. And it would be such a gift to me if you all would take the time and visit the 2 links before and the 2 links after yours. Maybe even leave them a comment?
I try my darndest to get around to everyone but I don't know that it will happen this week. I'll do my best, but you all could be a great help to me in that department so that everyone can get a little bit of linky party love!

Now, let the Merriment Begin!
Here is how to link up...

1. Add your Permalink to your entry but not your General Blog Address. To get your Permalink, click on the title of the blog post you are wanting to submit and copy and paste the address into the URL box. You will also have to add your address but it will not be visible to anyone else.
2. Do not try and Link up until you have actually published that particular post on your blog.
3. Please link back to the host blog, Southern In My Heart, so that those who visit your blog will be able to find some wonderful Inspiration from everyone else.

I hope you have a wonderful weekend preparing for the week of celebration ahead! I'm off to my son's School Christmas Program. That should be good for some chuckles and maybe even a few tears!

From this Southern Girl at Heart,
Vanessa
I'm linking this post to
Tuesday Treasures

A Labor of the Heart

I just want to say a quick thank you to everyone for your very kind comments towards my last “Labor of the Heart” post!
Out of everything I have shared over these past 3 months, that was by far the most personal and the most anxiety inducing!

 In fact, after I hit the "Publish Post" button I sat down and ate 4 oatmeal cookies...in a row...yep...that's right...just popped 'em in one right after the next.
They had chocolate chips in them too, of course.

But, you were all very gracious and kind and so I am venturing forth with the next installment of our story. After some of the feedback and questions I received last time, I thought I would start including some Helpful Hints for Adoptive Families. We, by no stretch of the imagination, have all the answers but these are things I wish someone would have told us when we were just starting out as new parents... a.k.a. "big ol' idiots"!

I just couldn't resist sharing this photo with you!

It is in the top 5 of my all-time favorite pictures of my precious girl!

*Helpful Hints for Adoptive Parents!*

When you first bring your baby/child home, immediately begin telling them things like, “We feel so blessed that we Adopted you!” and “Adopting you was the best thing we have ever done!” Even if you are saying this to a sleeping infant, feeling the word “Adopted” roll off your tongue will make you so much more comfortable with it. And if you are comfortable with it, your child will be too! Practice in front of the mirror if you have to, but make sure that this term is as natural to you as it can possibly be. Trust me, it will be a gift you give to your children!

And now…A Labor of the Heart-Part 2
(If you missed Part 1, you can find it under the Labor of the Heart tab at the top)
 

The other night I dreamed I was pregnant. I woke up in that state of mind where you are not quite sure if you are still in dreamland or if it is reality. The tears stung my eyes and I was surprised. Surprised that the hurt could still be there after all these years. And yet, I quickly remembered another night, many years ago, when I awakened to realize that I had been sobbing in my sleep. How is it possible to be in so much pain that you are crying when you aren’t even awake? On that night, though, I had my “Experience” with God. I’m going to save the details for another time. But, let me say that this was a life-changing, faith-changing moment and one that I cling to whenever I have doubts or whenever that pain winds its way around my heart once more.

 

They had told us, “It will be very unlikely that you will be able to get pregnant.”

But doesn’t "unlikely" leave room for maybe!

“You will probably never have biological children but who knows what kind of advances in medicine will be around by the time you actually want them!”

So, when you say "probably", that means that there is still a chance, right?

 What no one ever realized is that those nuances of conversation would cause us to never fully grasp the reality of the situation. And besides, how can you know the deep pain of wanting something that you will never have, until you actually begin to long for it? Babies weren’t on the agenda anyway! We were going to travel and eat out and just enjoy being a couple. Newlyweds aren’t supposed to be worried about things like the 'I' word...INFERTILITY!
They don’t really cover that in pre-marital counseling.

To be continued...

P.S. Are you the kind of person who reads the last page of a book first? Well, if so, I'll let you in on a little secret...this story has a very, very happy ending!
 Just in case you wondered!

From this Southern Girl at Heart,
Vanessa

Taking the Plunge!

Can Adoption be Funny?
Well, when you have a (then) four year old in your life, it sure can be! I just have to share this story with you all before I tell you what is meant by the title,
"Taking the Plunge".

 When we were in the middle of the 'waiting' stage for our second Adoption, we began to slowly, cautiously prepare our first Rascal for the prospect of a new sibling. You see, when you Adopt, you have absolutely no idea of timeframe and we didn't want him to think it was going to happen soon, but we also didn't want to spring it on him. "Surprise! You had no idea this was coming but here is your new Sister!"

We had brief conversations about it and one of them went just like this...

Rascal 1 and Mommy in the car together.

Mommy: "So buddy, you remember how we talked about the fact that we adopted you and how special that makes you?"

Rascal 1: "Uh-huh...look at that bus over there mommy!"

Mommy: "And you know that you grew in your birthmother's tummy and that God told her that she was to give you to us so that we could be your mommy and daddy forever and ever!"

Rascal 1: "Yeah, I know I'm special mommy, blah, blah, blah. Can we go to McDonald's today?"

Mommy: "No, not today buddy. Well, did you know that mommy and daddy are praying that we will get to adopt another baby and that this will make you a Big Brother?"

Rascal 1: "I'm going to be a big brudder?"

Mommy: "That's right! How cool is that going to be! Did you also know that this baby will grow in her birthmother's tummy too? But she will have a different birthmother than you have. And, we will adopt her too and be her forever family!"

Rascal 1: silence....

Mommy: "So, what do you think about all of this buddy? Do you think that sounds like a good idea?"

Rascal 1: "Nah...I just think we should get the baby at COSTCO!"

Mommy: Trying to suppress hysterical laughter while keeping the car on the road..."That would be handy, huh buddy?"

I'm picturing a couple walking through the Megastore with rows and rows of babies amidst the vats of mayonnaise and batteries!

"I'd like that one right there! The one with the big brown eyes!"
If only it were that easy...

We were at a wedding recently and to describe it in all it's glory would really need an entire separate post. Picture rows of folding chairs outside in a front yard right next to pup-tents and campers with 6 large dogs running around, guests sitting down with cans of Miller in their hands and 'cigs' behind their ears, the bride dancing up the aisle and then when pronounced husband and wife, racing back down the "aisle" to grab her fiddle! At one point my husband said, "Isn't that the guy who married them?" I turned to see that the officiant (loose term) had changed from his suit into cut-off camo shorts and boots with his long mane of hair set free from its pony-tail. Oh, and a 'cig' tucked behind his ear! I'm not making this up and couldn't even if I tried!

But, at this most sacred and reverent of occasions, we sat with some great couples and eventually began talking about all of our kiddos. One couple had also adopted their son and they began to ask about our story and also to pick our brains for tips for talking to your kids about their adoptions (their son is much younger than ours). After we shared some of our journey with them, the wife said "You know, you really should be writing all of this down!"

So, I'm taking her advice and TAKING THE PLUNGE!

This is not just a story about Infertility and Adoption. This is a story about Faith.

For better or for worse, this is the first installment of our

Labor of the Heart!

Labor. What do you think of when you hear this word? If you are like me, my mind immediately conjures up images of a Hospital Delivery Room. A woman straining to bring new life into the world. A husband coaching, cheering, encouraging and hopefully not passing out! But for me, labor has another meaning. One definition states that it is “to suffer from distress or a disadvantage.” Still another says that it is “to strive painstakingly or to proceed with great effort.” Now those are definitions I can relate to!
Ours may not have been a physical labor,
but it was still a labor of the heart.

When it all began we were footloose and fancy free! That is what being a newlywed is all about right? We were deeply in love, had great jobs, disposable income (those were the days!), and had just bought our first home. A town-home that had previously been a rental and we lovingly began to bring back to life. What more could you ask for right? And yet, it was always there. That nagging feeling that we could never quite shake. We never totally felt that unabashed hope for the future that newlyweds should feel. A future that seems uncomplicated and perfect with all of the pieces of the puzzle falling into place. Travel, buy a real house, white picket fence and all, and have a baby...right? Isn't that the way it is supposed to go? "First comes love, then comes marriage, then comes baby in the baby carriage." Sweet, simplistic and uncomplicated. And totally unrealistic! Where did this little poem come from anyway? And, why do we grow up thinking that our lives are going to be just that easy?

To be continued...


I'm linking up with Tuesdays Unwrapped

Firsts!

*CAUTION!*
Screen may become wet while reading this post as there were moments of watering eyes followed by brief periods of  Ugly Crying. You know, the dripping nose, can't catch your breath, squished up face kind of crying!
Don't say you weren't warned!

FIRSTS...

First born and first Adopted!

First Pumpkin Patch
(Wait! Which ones are the pumpkins?)

First Cowboy Boots!

(What? Don't all cowboys suck their thumbs?)

First Beach Trip!

First time Fishing. With Poppa of course!

First Bike!

(Gotta love those Grandpa style PJ's!)

First time Moving to a new house!

And...FIRST GRADE!

That's right folks, my baby started First Grade today and while his Mama fought tears all day, this boy was so excited he had his back-pack on a good 30 minutes before we actually left!

He is attending a wonderful little Christian school and when we got there he discovered he was sitting right next to one of his best buddies. I'm sure it won't last long because his teacher will soon discover how chatty they are together and rearrange their desks!

As I hugged him good-bye and told him how proud we were of him and that we would be praying for him today he said,

"Mom, I know you are going to miss me,

but I won't be gone long!"

It took every ounce of strength I had not to

burst into tears right there!

Bless that boy!

Here's a challenge for you...can you find the crying child in this picture?

See her yet? Here is a closer look...

Love it!

Blessings to all of you from this

Southern Girl at Heart,

Vanessa
*And, one more First...I'm linking up with the Simple Pleasures Party over at A Collection of This and That and Chatting at the Sky*

For These Children I Prayed!

So, as I sit down to write this post, I realize that it is much harder to reveal your heart to BlogWorld than it is to reveal your latest home projects! So, be kind...

As you may have guessed already, becoming a mother was no easy prospect for me. I believe that infertility is either going to make you or break you. And, gratefully, it didn't break us! In fact, it served to make us not only stronger in our faith, but also in our marriage in ways we never could have imagined. I won't go into too many details at this point, but just know this...I could never have dreamed up 2 more perfect children for our family! And I wouldn't trade all the pregnancies in the world, for the joy-filled, bittersweet experience of Adoption.

Since I am dedicating this week to my daughter, Lauren, I will share with you a snippet of the Christmas Letter we sent out the year that she was born...

Dearest Family and Friends,

It is with the greatest joy and gratitude that we write this letter this year. As of this summer, we were certain that by Christmas there would be no new news to report on our family and yet God had a great surprise in store for us! One day in mid-July, Ian informed Vanessa that he wanted to have a lemonade-stand and make a little spending money. As they walked in the door from a lemonade buying trip to Wal-Mart, the phone was ringing. It was the phone call that changed our lives forever! A baby girl was going to be born in two weeks time and would we be interested in adopting her. Would we! As Vanessa sat with Ian in the driveway while he welcomed his customers, she marveled at the fact that on an ordinary summer day, coming home from Wal-Mart, God could answer our prayers and reveal His sovereign plan for our family through one simple phone call.

A little over two weeks later, Lauren Elizabeth came into this world and into our hearts! She is a wonderfully happy baby and laughs more at her big brother than anyone else. And her big brown eyes are a delightful bonus!

When you are literally "gifted" your children, you realize just how very true the words "Children are a gift from God" are!

Tomorrow I will feature more of Lauren's room as well as the little girl's room of one of my favorite Bloggers!