A Labor of the Heart

I just want to say a quick thank you to everyone for your very kind comments towards my last “Labor of the Heart” post!
Out of everything I have shared over these past 3 months, that was by far the most personal and the most anxiety inducing!

 In fact, after I hit the "Publish Post" button I sat down and ate 4 oatmeal cookies...in a row...yep...that's right...just popped 'em in one right after the next.
They had chocolate chips in them too, of course.

But, you were all very gracious and kind and so I am venturing forth with the next installment of our story. After some of the feedback and questions I received last time, I thought I would start including some Helpful Hints for Adoptive Families. We, by no stretch of the imagination, have all the answers but these are things I wish someone would have told us when we were just starting out as new parents... a.k.a. "big ol' idiots"!

I just couldn't resist sharing this photo with you!

It is in the top 5 of my all-time favorite pictures of my precious girl!

*Helpful Hints for Adoptive Parents!*

When you first bring your baby/child home, immediately begin telling them things like, “We feel so blessed that we Adopted you!” and “Adopting you was the best thing we have ever done!” Even if you are saying this to a sleeping infant, feeling the word “Adopted” roll off your tongue will make you so much more comfortable with it. And if you are comfortable with it, your child will be too! Practice in front of the mirror if you have to, but make sure that this term is as natural to you as it can possibly be. Trust me, it will be a gift you give to your children!

And now…A Labor of the Heart-Part 2
(If you missed Part 1, you can find it under the Labor of the Heart tab at the top)
 

The other night I dreamed I was pregnant. I woke up in that state of mind where you are not quite sure if you are still in dreamland or if it is reality. The tears stung my eyes and I was surprised. Surprised that the hurt could still be there after all these years. And yet, I quickly remembered another night, many years ago, when I awakened to realize that I had been sobbing in my sleep. How is it possible to be in so much pain that you are crying when you aren’t even awake? On that night, though, I had my “Experience” with God. I’m going to save the details for another time. But, let me say that this was a life-changing, faith-changing moment and one that I cling to whenever I have doubts or whenever that pain winds its way around my heart once more.

 

They had told us, “It will be very unlikely that you will be able to get pregnant.”

But doesn’t "unlikely" leave room for maybe!

“You will probably never have biological children but who knows what kind of advances in medicine will be around by the time you actually want them!”

So, when you say "probably", that means that there is still a chance, right?

 What no one ever realized is that those nuances of conversation would cause us to never fully grasp the reality of the situation. And besides, how can you know the deep pain of wanting something that you will never have, until you actually begin to long for it? Babies weren’t on the agenda anyway! We were going to travel and eat out and just enjoy being a couple. Newlyweds aren’t supposed to be worried about things like the 'I' word...INFERTILITY!
They don’t really cover that in pre-marital counseling.

To be continued...

P.S. Are you the kind of person who reads the last page of a book first? Well, if so, I'll let you in on a little secret...this story has a very, very happy ending!
 Just in case you wondered!

From this Southern Girl at Heart,
Vanessa